The Future I Always Fear…

Today was a rather mundane day at office. Being a Thursday, there are only a handful of people who work. Chance or luck or any other fancy word invented by Paulo Coelho brought me upon this magazine. Its actually a monthly published by my company. The very last page of this magazine had an interview with one of the senior guys at my place. I saw it and imagined myself sitting in his place 35 years from now….this is how it goes….

Down Memory Lane

Sudhakar M Kamath
Deputy General Manager- Planning,

Q. How would you describe your journey in this company?
I feel I have been very lucky (?) to join this company. I remember the day I heard the news that I had been selected in the interview. (reminiscing) It was a dream come true for me to join such a prestigious organization. I was very lucky to have joined a world famous project in the initial phase of my career and I have never looked back since then.

Q. What has been your most memorable moment?
There have been numerous such moments. One of the special ones was in Singur. There due to some politician’s hunger strike, we had to take a route which took 5 ½ hours to complete a bus journey which otherwise could have taken only 45 mins. I remember how the bus used to stop every 10-15 metres due to a traffic jam. That whole period of 15 days was like a new revelation for me.

Q. What do you think sets this company apart from others?
This company has given me the freedom to take decisions right from a very young age. I was exposed to various facets of this company very early which is but a utopian dream in other companies. (Excitedly) Forget a job switch, I did not even make a resume after I joined here.

The other side of Mr. Kamath (Yeah Right!)
Your Hometown-
Hyderabad …no wait!!. I think I’m from somewhere in Karnataka…but I definitely think it is Goa…oh hell!! I’ve lived half my life here…I think Im from Pune.

What are you currently reading?
The Ramayana, The Mahabharata and The Bhagvad Gita (Do you expect me to read Playboy at this age???)

Where did you go for a recent holiday?
Croatia. I especially like the Croatian version of Vada Pav that you get over there.

Your Favourite Cuisine- 
I am a huge fan of Ecuadorian cuisine. They have a national dish called 'Chicken Ecuadori' which is prepared only on special occasions like someone's marriage.



Your Favourite One-Liner
I don’t enjoy other’s failures and I don’t like others to use me as a scapegoat for their failures (Killer Punch!!)

Just imagining myself there, answering these pointless questions put jitters in me. The truth is that people who stick around here for long are here because this company pays people to do what they enjoy most- leisure. People from around here make this company their last one because here, they can happily retire doing nothing all their life. Whoever, has joined this company as a GET has always left it. If he didn’t it means

a. He didn’t get admission to any MBA/ MS college
b. His hometown is only an hour’s drive from here
c. His girlfriend/ boyfriend lived here and they got happily married or the last
d. He just didn’t have it in him to go higher

Will I really answer these questions 35 years from now? I definitely don’t fall in the first three categories. Am I the fourth kind?…Only time can tell….

PS- May turn out to be less fun than the previous ones. But I'm sure you've got the message that is 'Don't ever become this'.

The company of ‘giants’

Pathetic title this. Even more pathetic is the thought process that is going on in my mind right now.

Fyi.The title is actually taken from a quote by Jack Welch, the ex- CEO of GE.

When I joined this place where I now work, all of us were equal or so it was made out to be. But in the past three years everything has changed. Everything except me. I still am at the lowest rung in the management ladder. Had the misfortune of getting a below average appraisal and while everyone around me kept moving on. I stayed back. Most of the times on purpose and the other times, I was just plain unlucky.

How wrong was I? What was I thinking all this time? These thoughts come and haunt me now. The worst questions are yet to come. But I have this ability to run away from things I don’t want to face. So, safe for now.

In the final year of my college, I joined a CAT prep course, and I did not attend even a single lecture, did not appear for any of the mocks and took a loan from a friend so that I could go to Jamshedpur to write the exam. I of course, spent a major chunk of that cash on liquor.

My thoughts at that time were simple. I am in the final year of one the best periods of my life. Should’nt I be enjoying this with my friends? Why waste this period studying for MBA? And so year one was down. And I joined this company.

I joined this company and I thought, since I have joined, I should atleast stay for one year and gain some experience. And worked like a maniac, when my friends came home early and started preparing. I always told myself, this is work. I need the experience. I need to become a man now before joining an MBA. And year two was down.

In the third year, I was shifted to one of the worst places I could have been, I thought this should teach me a lesson, and I started studying but a little too late and a little too less. Nothing happened. I mean of course, if you see the end result, I still was at the same place. And so passed year three.

Now in the fourth year, when I was just thinking that it couldn’t get any worse, a torpedo, the intra company selection of the crème-de- la- crème happened. And I didn’t appear once again, thinking I was not ready yet. Not now. But the selection happened and I still am at the same place. year four down.

I read a quote written by Fyodor Dostoevsky sometime back. It offered a solace, yes. But, it was not to be there forever. If it had been, I wouldn’t be writing this piece now. Would I?

All the people who were with me during this period have now gone on to become giants. And here I am. Lurking in the darkness called ‘routine’ which is consuming me by the minute and now it feels even I don’t want to face the light of the day.

The worst questions have now been asked. And I shall do now what I have always done... Run away.

P.S- pls do not offer your sympathies. This was written because I wanted to accept the mistakes I have made.